What Kind Of Vow Renewal Celebration Do You Want?

Renewing Your Wedding Vows: A Complete Planning Guide to Saying 'I Still Do'
by Sharon Naylor

Say "I do" all over again with significance and style

Whether this is your chance to have the wedding you always wanted, you're celebrating a milestone anniversary, or you simply want to reaffirm your commitment to each other, the renewing of your vows is an important symbolic step in your relationship.

Celebrated wedding planner Sharon Naylor helps you make your second time around your best yet. Renewing Your Wedding Vows provides valuable guidance on how to:

• phrase your invitation
• choose appropriate attire and flowers
• incorporate children into the ceremony
• decide about gifts and registries
• write your vows
• plan the logistics of the proceedings
• choose your location: ballroom, beach, your home, and more...

Imagine standing in front of a waterfall ... in Hawaii. You have a hibiscus flower tucked behind your ear; your shoulders are tan and you're in a white sundress with a pink and white flower lei around your neck. Your husband takes your hand and tells you he'll love you forever as a dozen of your closest friends and family look on with tears in their eyes. Behind them, a rainbow arches over the clear sky, diving into the azure blue ocean.

Or ...

Imagine once again walking down the aisle in the same church or synagogue where you were originally married. You're carrying a bouquet of white gardenias and roses just like those you had at your wedding. Your friends and family-all two hundred of them-stand as you walk by, escorted by your sons. Your husband smiles at you with pure adoration in his eyes, overwhelmed by how beautiful you are as you approach. You both repeat the very same vows you spoke twenty years ago, and they mean even more to you now.

So what do you have in mind as your wedding vow renewal celebration style? Something small and simple? A getaway to a tropical island? A do-over of your wedding day, but even better? What's so wonderful about this celebration is that it's yours to dream up and design any way you wish.

You've undoubtedly heard about various celebrities' wedding vow renewals-like Celine Dion's $1.5 million Arabian Nights-themed extravaganza in Las Vegas for her fourth anniversary with husband, René Angelil (where costumed servants carried Ms. Dion into the room like a queen), or Madonna and Guy Ritchie's reported do-over "after a rough year." These extravagant bashes definitely have an inspiring role in the growing trend of wedding vow renewal ceremonies today. But not all couples are copying celebrity style for their own celebrations. The choice of vow renewal ceremony and reception style is unlimited in possibilities and completely individual and personal. Just look at the following examples of real-life vow renewal celebrations, at the wildly varying range of style and formalities and themes. In a moment, you'll start creating your own picture for your own...

The Wedding You Never Had - Back when you were newly engaged, you imagined an elegant wedding in a hotel's ballroom, with ice sculptures, a harpist playing at the cocktail hour, a seafood buffet, a designer gown, a five-tiered cake ... but it wasn't meant to be. Back then, your parents were in charge of the wedding (they were paying for it), so the event was more them than you. It's always something that's been in your mind, that you wished you would have spoken up and requested more of your own choices. But you stayed quiet then. It was a lovely wedding, even if it didn't include some of the things you dreamed of. And you still married the man of your dreams, so who's complaining? Now, though, your wedding vow renewal ceremony is going to be everything you wanted back then and more. The harpist you didn't have then will be playing at your cocktail hour now. Your gown will be more sophisticated, not the puffball you look at in horror in your wedding pictures. (It's not your fault... Vera Wang wasn't around then.) This celebration will be your dream come true. You have the resources now to make it happen for yourselves, and it's going to be wonderful to celebrate the way you've always wanted. So bring on the limousines, the fine wines and champagnes, the sushi station, and the sage green invitations with dark green engraved print. You get a second chance.

Something Out in Nature - Forget the ballroom and the expensive champagne. What's really you would be gathering everyone together at a scenic overview with a beautiful view of the ocean, the desert, or the mountains, or by a lake.

On the Beach - There's a reason so many weddings take place at oceanside, and it's the same reason so many wedding vow renewal ceremonies are also planned as beach celebrations. You'll take your vows barefoot in the sand as everyone looks on, as the ocean waves curl and rush to shore, and then after you seal your vows with a kiss, you'll join hands and walk along the beach together.

The Destination Renewal-This style is quickly becoming a favorite of first-time brides and grooms who fly a handful of their closest guests to a tropical island. Your renewal celebration could be the same exact style ... with all of the island resort perks like steel drum players setting the tone for your walk toward the officiant.

The World Is Waiting ...

Island resorts are opening their doors to you with vow renewal or second honeymoon packages that may be better than your original honeymoon. Massages on the beach may be included, and your getaway ride is a pair of white horses on the beach. All as part of the package. In addition to the dream island getaway, another option is going out to the American West, standing before majestic desert rock formations in Arizona, or out in Big Sky Country of Montana before mountainous vistas and in wide-open spaces. Such a getaway makes your destination vow renewal event a great adventure for all of your guests.

A Cruise - Now you can book a wedding vow renewal cruise, a special package designed by many cruise lines to include a ceremony officiated by the ship's captain, either out on deck or in a formal dining room, even in the onboard chapel. You'll often receive a bottle of champagne to celebrate, take-home champagne flutes to commemorate your renewal, a bouquet and boutonniere, a two- or three-tiered wedding cake, live or recorded music to set the scene, and photography and videography. Some cruise lines offer onshore excursions in their ports of call, so you could renew your vows onboard and then celebrate with your guests in Cancun, Hawaii, Europe, Canada, the Bahamas, even Alaska for quite a grand and exciting backdrop to your celebration.

A City Loft - It's your Renewal and the City party, with chic decor, Asian fusion food, cosmopolitans or mojitos, a view of the city lights at night, and everyone's dressed fabulously. A sophisticated, trendy party at a friend's amazing loft (which could be your "something borrowed" this time around)-or at one of the many stylish lofts that you can rent for your party-might be just your style. You often go into the city to enjoy the culture and nightlife, the great restaurants and entertainment, so there's no other theme you'd rather enjoy for your own celebration than one that reflects your shared interests.

A Dessert and Champagne Party - You've laughed together after attending relatives' and friends' weddings that you would have been happy with just the desserts and the cake. You're both decadent in your tastes-you love chocolate and a fine champagne. So your evening party will be all about the cake, the tiramisu, and the chocolate-covered strawberries.

A Brunch - Sunday morning could bring you to a restaurant or hotel's ballroom for a lavish brunch with dozens of food stations, mimosas, omelets and crepes to order, and a killer dessert bar in addition to your wedding cake. This morning celebration could be held right after church where your vows would be renewed by the same officiant who originally married you.

A Backyard Gathering - You don't need to dress up and drink champagne. You're happiest in jeans and a T-shirt, and so are your family and friends. So you could plan an informal backyard gathering, fire up the barbecue grill, cook up some ribs and chicken and mahi mahi, portabello mushrooms and shrimp kebabs, and set the blender to its daiquiri setting. A family-style barbecue gives you just the comfy at-home celebration you wanted, and the garden you planted, the trellis you tended, are the perfect backdrop for your day.

A Simple, Private Ceremony at Home - Your dream is to descend your staircase to the tune of "the wedding march", repeat your vows in front of the fireplace, then gather with the family around the dining room table. This style brings yet another in a long line of special family celebrations to your home.

By no means are these the only options. They're simply the ones most popular right now. We all want to celebrate our happiest moments in environments and in styles that are most us. And envisioning your ideal style and theme is the next step toward your own planning process.

Copyright © 2006 by Sharon Naylor.

About the Author

Sharon Naylor, Sharon Naylor is a wedding expert and the author of over 30 wedding books, including Renewing Your Wedding Vows, The Complete Outdoor Wedding Planner, The Ultimate Bridal Shower Idea Book, and more. She answers questions from brides, grooms, their bridal parties and families at several bridal Web sites, and she has appeared as a wedding expert on Inside Edition, Nightline, ABC News, Fox 5 News, One on One With Steve Adubato, and Lifetime. An in-demand wedding authority, she has been quoted in The New York Times, The Chicago Tribune, The Wall Street Journal, Newsweek, BBC London, InStyle Weddings, Brides, Modern Bride, Bridal Guide, Southern Bride, Wedding Dresses, Wedding Channel and many others. She lives in Madison, New Jersey.